18 July 2013

When Siamese Twins Must be Separated, and other grief the historian must bear.

In June, my good friend Sarah and I resolved to each write an academic article during the month of July. We're loosely following a proven plan of attack, and every few days or so we meet online to see what kind of progress we are making. It is not too difficult to write an article—even when aforementioned term is preceded by terms like “peer reviewed” and “academic journal.” These bad boys weigh in at approximately 10,000 words (30-35 pages, double spaced). It might seem like a lot, but for people who are basically trained to write their way into a doctoral title (a dissertation is upwards of 250 pages, emphasis on the "upwards of"), an article shouldn't be that difficult. 

Like most thing in life, however, they are.


I am three-quarters of the way finished with my rough draft—right around 8,000 words with most of the notes already added. I'm probably done with the hardest part of the writing, so by now it should be a sprint to the proverbial finish line. Instead, I've been stuck for days in the penultimate section of the paper, where I take everything I've talked about so far and try to support it with some bits of theory and methodology. This feels suspiciously less like the homestretch of a race, and more like standing idly on top of a vast, barren plateau—with vultures circling above me. Figuratively speaking. I hope.





I am coming up on a little less than two weeks left in this tiny place. This past Saturday marked the official commencement of my sorting-trashing-and-packing routine which has precluded all of the eleven+ relocations I've experienced in the last thirteen years. This ritual usually begins with a lot of baffled attempts at surveying my possessions, and reliving that moment you realize you will never be able to take it all with you. Despite the fact I've kept myself on a very tight leash regarding purchasing here, I seemed to have acquired more than what I came here with. As the research fellow who has been here longer than any other current scholarship holder, I have been the dumping grounds for the generosity of others who have faced the same quandary of what to do with all the stuff they've amassed here. Hence, I've acquired any number of things, from computer speakers to a computer printer/ scanner; from 3 kg dumbbells to a yoga mat; a rolling office chair; a large-frame reading chair; from random throw pillows to large, framed portraits that say things like “home” and “dream” on them; countless pencils and other office paraphernalia; books; magazines; picture frame; the cook; the baker; the candlestick maker.

In an effort to make the chaos of it all seem about as stressful as a trip to the grocery store, I started by making a list. Of lists. In all, eight lists. A list of things to trash. A list of things to keep and give, and whom to give them to. What to pack in my checked baggage. What to pack for the vacation I'm taking to Croatia before flying home. What to pack in my carry on. What to pack in the carry on I will take to my best friend's wedding in Wisconsin the morning after I arrive in Toronto (don't worry Rachel, I love you). A “before leaving WfB” to-do list... Plus a few other lists I've probably forgotten about.

The one thing that these lists basically taught me is: I only have two suitcases. And there is no way everything will fit in them. And no amount of list-making will change that. So, stop stressing and start trashing (or “gift” giving, as Trish will soon learn).



This morning, while enjoying the first, serene hours of the day in the library reading room, the reason why I am stuck in my article finally revealed itself. I'm stuck because I'm trying to write two articles into one.

For my next trick, I shall try to explain what those two are. The first paper, the one I actually set out to write, is about how 01 January made people think about the end of the world a lot more—I mean, a lot more than usual for that time period (if you've read my blog so far, you know that's saying a lot, since they were pretty much thinking about it most of the time anyway). There was something about concluding an old year, and taking those first few steps into the pristine, freshly fallen snows of a new year that made people wonder about what heaven would be like, and about the divine judgment they'd have to withstand in order to get there. I really like this topic because a.) I get to talk about the end of the world for the umpteenth time in my very young and naïve career as an academic; and b.) I thought of a really schnazzy title for the thing, so schnazzy I won't even mention it here, just in case thousands of the world leading early modern historians are secret closet reader of my blog and steal the title from me before I have a chance to do anything with it (one can dream, right?)

Anyway, that's the paper I wanted to write. The second paper is a lot more basic, and unfortunately, is probably the one that needs to get written about first. Essentially, it's about new year's day in early modern Germany (1500-1700). See, pretty boring, right? For obvious bore-related reasons, I did not anticipate talking about this very much in the article about new years/ apocalypse article. Surely, I thought, it would suffice to just tack a few paragraphs onto the introduction, in order to provide “historical context” that would explain “where we get our new year's from.”

Well, thanks to the fact that history is never as simple as you think it is, “This is where we got our new year's from” turned into “By the way, for a really long time, there was some serious confusion as to when the year even started—some thought Christmas, some thought 01 January, and other people thought 25 March. And some people thought it was all three or neither.”

And then, that turned into “here's why everything you ever thought about new year's was a lie.”

Well, not everything.




Besides my goal with Sarah to write an article this month, I set a goal with the Fiancee to wake up at 6:30AM every morning this month—7AM on weekends. I don't really know what was going through my mind when we set that goal, I think something about trying to reset my body clock or be more productive or something. 

At heart, I am a morning person—I function best when I wake up at the crack of dawn and work before anyone else get up. But every so often, I go through phases where I just laze around in bed not doing much of anything until I'm darn well good and ready. Strangely, such phases coincide with seasons in which I have no real responsibility to anyone or anything but myself and my own work, which becomes really depressing after a while. It turns out that a lack of obligations can be really stressful. I find setting arbitrary goals helps me recreate that sense of obligation, which can be really fulfilling.
In this case, however, I realized that even succeeding in one's goals can have its downside. Namely sleep deprivation. Waking up at 6:30AM means I can't just go to bed whenever I please. Going to bed early means I can't loose track of time scouring facebook for signs that other people exist. Nor does it mean I can keep drinking coffee until dinner time, no matter how much I adore the bitter guzzle of tar juice. The more I try to have my cake and eat it too, the more exhausted I become.
You just can't fit it all into one day. Or suitcase. Or article. Life is short, and so is everything else. Better to live selectively and intentionally rather than all-inclusively and indescriminately, right?




I don't care. I don't want to split them up. I don't want to write two articles about new year's in post-Reformation Germany—even if it would look good on my resumee. I want to write one article, and tie it up masterfully into a beautifully bound, logically cohesive, spell-bindingly captivating read (by academic standards). And then I want to write a poem about it. And then I want to paint a picture about the poem, and sell it, and make everyone think how brilliant I am. How I just capture, in one glorious brush stroke, the full spectrum of what it means to be a human being suspended in this both tragic and magnificent fabric of temporality. And then I want to use the money I make off of that painting to solve world hunger.

Sigh. Sometimes people tell me I set unrealistic goals for myself.




There comes a time in every woman's life who gives birth to Siamese twins, a time when she must decide whether to intervene and separate them, or let them play with the cards they've been dealt. Even if their mutual liver(s) are fused between the two bodies. She (and hopefully the father too) must make the choice knowing that, either way, one or both of the twins could die. I'm sure that whatever decision she arrives at, she does so out of love—she wants to give her darlings the best possible chance at life.

Today, I am that mother. Kind of. And, as Steven King explained once in regards to the writing process, if I want my article to survive, I must “kill my darlings.”

But, should someday my two little Siamese twins topics come back to seek retribution for my fateful choice to separate them, I would like to say how much I love them. How much I want them to survive in the field of history as fully formed arguments, rather than to be eternally constrained by the parameters of one article. And so, I am cutting their wings—in the hopes that one day, they will fly. (That is the most incoherent and poetic metaphor ever! Which is why I'm not deleting it!)

I just better finish all of this by the end of the month if I want to make that goal.


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